Real relationships: happy or right?

When you see your friend fall, stop and think.

The temptation will be to open your mouth and say what you see. You are right, no doubt. You could see it coming from a far.

But stop. For in this crucial moment the above quote is never more important.

Of course you have the option of displaying your perilous wisdom. It feels good to be right. It feels good to think we actually know something. This certainty can give sure footing at a time when nothing is certain.

This comes at a price. The price is that friend. That friend who knows they’re wrong, knows they’ve made a mistake and knows it’s not the first time. It’s that friend who pays for your indulgence.

I’m not asking you to sweep it under the carpet or plead ignorance, that helps no-one. You can acknowledge the mistake and error without indulging or enjoying the moment.

You can sit in silence if you must.  You can remove yourself from the situation if necessary.

When we do this, we build our relationships, we make it easier on the other. For no amount of pity, reprimand or satisfaction can change the person.

Maybe that friend needs to learn their own lesson. Maybe that friend has a few more rounds to do before they set themselves free. That’s the beauty of growth we never know when the other will break-through.

Often in those moments when everyone has gone, when hope has almost all but gone. That’s when it comes, that’s when the light gets through.

So don’t give up hope and don’t be so sure.

And remember the flow. Soon it will be you, it will be you who falls, it will be you who does not know. Your friend will no doubt have seen your personal foes – will have seen it coming too.

Remember that. Be careful with what you think you know.

None of us are ever done!

Struggling with your own growth, download Change: Sail the Storm in 4 Simple Steps

Seriously struggling: download The Key to Mental Health here

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